never pay attention to the rumors and what they assume

At times I fret about possible outcomes to any given situation. But as long as I have my damn music and headphones, ain't ish gonna worry me. Ye says I'm paranoid...Pac knows there's nothing I won't do for love, Drake knows I'm the effin best, Brandy knows I wanna be down, Aaliyah co-signs me on bein one in a milli, and Wayne wouldn't care if i was a damn prostitute. So as long as my ears don't fail me (foxy brown) my industry homies have my back...they see the unknown...and I'd like to thank you for that.... When I have my doubts, y'all confirm my faith before ne one else. With ur melodic hooks, crazy punch lines, and verb usage...there's no better way to tell me a story. "Swallow Me" in the words of Esthero...now that's a big ass gulp. But above them all "Sky is the Limit" correct me if I'm wrong. Life is an enigma, and i spend too much of it trying to solve it. What's meant to be will be, take me as i am motherfucka.

music/videos...i am feeling, ooh yes.

So...I don't really watch T.V. that much when I'm on campus...And when I turn the T.V. on it's generally on the channel my roommate's left it on. Which is something with not much substance like 'Bad Girls Club'. However, I made an effort to catch Kid CuDi and Kanye's appearance on 106 and Park about a week or two ago. There, they both released their new videos. Kanye with "Welcome to Heartbreak" and CuDi with "Day N' Nite." So I will leave those here as well as Wayne's latest "Prom Queen" I like this video. For one, he looks ADORABLE and his hair looks sooo good lol. So enjoy!!!

Kid Cudi- Day n Nite

Lil Wayne - Prom Queen [Official Music Video]

Welcome to Heartbreak

Also, this is a bit late...but ughh Drake 'Drizzy' Rogers, yes the yellow kidd that used to play up on DeGrassi lol. His mixtape So Far Gone, I honestly don't think it could've been any better or been released at a better time. Some will say it sounds like 808's...okay maybe a track or two...but damn, give the dude props. "Best I've Ever Had" is freaking genuis..."Uptown"...all of them really. So, if you have not downloaded it, please do yourself the favor!

catch me if you can.

i'm not big on regrets...
in fact that word is almost nonexistent to me. It seems to be an insult actually.
so if i say this don't take offense, i just ran across some thoughts in the last 24.

you ever come across something that once it's past a certain point, there's no turning back?
a horrible place to be, especially if it doesn't end up where u want it. i don't wanna say i regret these events...but DAMN, why me? I'm a wholesome person...and a good person at that. i feel so vulnerable and yucky. i don't like what i'm becoming. i wanna go back to being emotionless and quick...back to the Killa i've always been. i'm crazy, like my mind fuckin has me goin nuts inside. and then it's crazy bc i can feel my damn heartbeat about to explode. this has been happening to me for sometime now. it's like i've never been suicidal none of that/i'm not that type of insane...but shit...i can't take it...i need a vent, i need a way out....

prayer here i come.

I ain't cocky I'm just stating the obvious.

An ode to my bestfriend....
I try to be there for you in all ways possible and I know u try to do the same.
I put you before lots of things I prolly shouldn't, but b/c it's you, it makes it exceptionable.
I love things about you I would normally hate.
I know you're sorry for doing certain things to me.
I apologize for what I've done too.
Sometimes things seem harder than they really are, and half of the time u make things easier.
The other half, you'd rather make me find my way out.
I think about what you're doing when you're not with me wayyyyyyy too much.
Shaw, Bay, L, Shawty Lo Mein, Cho-day-----
I'm here for you no matter what....I'm a woman of my word. I got you.
Things are extremely hard for me....but I know it won't be for long.
You know me too well, you're my other half.
I feel incomplete without you....i apologize.
I know I acted a donkey in the lobby....
I still don't know what came over me, I guess sometimes when u want something so bad, u eventually drive yourself crazy enuff..
I miss you.
I need you.
&&
I LOVE YOU.
LARCE JACKSON MAGNIFICENT CARTER V




me + you= the perfect equal inequality
see you tomorrow, happy vday mister carter.

The Quiet things that No One Ever KNows.

OH man...I think I popped a freakin blood vessel in my right eye. THIS ISH IS KiLLIN ME! I can hardly get my eye off my mind which is on my mind which is usually on my money...that i don't have lol. Well, it's a Thursday, and I am pretty much content w/ my life except for a couple of things...that I have no idea how to go about.

Why don't you watch this video to know exactly what I'm talking about...



Anywho...I haven't dropped anything about fashion in a sec...so lemme tell you what's rockin my socks at the moment..


--these go sooo hard!
--peep the back view!



---i'd make love to these lol


---i don't speak francois...lol but i think it says somethin bout a freak lol


---i've been eyeing this for awhile now...AMERICAN PRIDE!!!

Oh...And I forgot to mention that I definitely have a skateboard now, and I have been trying to learn to skate...Thanx to my lil sis Taz for buyin me the board for Christmas and Xavi bein my coach lol...i feel 2x on my behind...OUCH!

--the evidence lol

iTz a dirty game and rule number 1....C.R.E.A.M.

Now, I've made up my mind.

No one will ever understand my train my thought. And darling, if you don't get me, I don't have time to explain myself....

---I'm really not a complex person. Atleast I try not to be. BUT WHATEVER I AM, I'M NOT GONNA BE CHANGING FOR YOU, YOU, OR YOU OVER THERE HIDING BEHIND THE TRASHCAN. I've never questioned why I was the way I was until now. And I hope I never do this to my being again. Sometimes as humans, yes we are humans, we want to feel superior to all things and I found out that it's impossible. And this is why i think Wayne calls hisself a Martian...not only cuz of his rare rapping talents, but bc he's trained hisself to not give a damn bout you or me. Yep, it's true...you can have a high for awhile...but b/c we aren't immune to emotions and all that bull, WE CAN'T BE BIG AND BAD 24/7. Sure...you can FAKE IT...but deep down, you know what the deal is. Your feelings got in the way, and ur trying to cover it up, for the sake of yourself and don't want to bless the other party w/ knowledge of knowing THEY got to you.

---So this is life huh??? Lessons learned, knowlegde gained, knowledge shared, love given...and none recieved back. OR maybe that's MY LIFE lol. I once heard that hard times call for high times...but that's not even my style. I'm too cute for black lips && that other jive. So...in the words of many rappers, chase the money---everything else will flock with it. INCLUDING THE UNWANTED!!!! Damn....it's so hard to shrug my shoulders about things that I wanna wild out on, but after my nap I took earlier today I learned that's my only way out...

Green Eggs and Ham

Have u ever wondered what that green eggs and ham combo tasted like...Dr. Seuss was on some other ish forreal lol....I mean green eggs?!?! Did it come from the hulk's anus? Anyways, this just crossed my mind, I mos def didn't intend on writing about my childhood memoirs.

Anywho...I love to laugh....it does a lot for my whole being forreal. Maybe this is why I resort to comedies and such. So what gets me rollin? The effin fighting scene from Pineapple Express... can u say hilario??? Watch for yourself.



Another video that can make any rainy day sunny is watching my homie w/ tourettes (LUDACHRIST style of course!)



Thanx for watching.
Amz