Transition---Ryan Leslie

So, i've been re-upping on my music...just got ryan leslie's TRANSITION, which is of course some smooth vibes. It's a new year, and idk what's to come, but i do know what i want. All i want is to be settled and to stop being tested. Life is nothing but a test with random breaks to BS around....like why do we have to put in all these years of schooling??? It's a freaking test.....all these circles and runarounds to get to where we hope to be. Crazy right? Like, all i want right now is to know where i'ma be right now so i can get right && know where i'm headed....i wanna fast forward all this debt and school and brokeness...to a world of fortune: which to me is successful career, family, and love. As long as i'm working towards that i'm good...but all these effin forks in the road are driving me nuts...But this is life! Nothing but a bunch of choices intertwined with yes', no's, and maybe so's. Eff it, I'm divin in this bitch head first. See y'all at the finish line.

I'm done...

We aren't on the same page...it sucks but i'm doin me now...u couldn't appreciate the word "we"...so goodnite and hurry up 2010.

Ode to whoever cares.

I can't stress the experiences I've gone through in this year alone. I really can't...it's too much, some memories I wanted to forget and others I'm dying to relive again. Even though, the hurt and pain I could have gone without....I know they will shape me into a stronger woman for my future kiddies. This summer on top of this semester has been rough for me....all circulating around him, my family, and my aspirations. Perhaps, my persona is altered a bit for sure....a colder me. A more cautious me...a fuck you pay you me. I'm ready to see things....I'm ready to do things...i'm finna gather 'round the good stuff, eff a damn Pizza Hut. Y'all ain't feedin me...shoot, I'm hardly feedin myself LOL. I'm just trying to do me...with or without you. You know what to do.

....I can't Miss like Mister

Lemme clear my throat...no really. LOL, i have a minor cold which won't turn major bc my immune system is my left hand man, the right hand position is already taken lol. It's a rainy day, but that's not killing me. I love rainy days bc everyone else hates them lol...and while they're busy moping in the storm I'm bringin sunshine to it, yah digg??

I think Kanye is hilarious...I mean who else would have the audacity to go on stage when not scheduled too? True nigganess...lol.

Besides...Beyonce had the best video of all time!

haha, gotta love it...i

love assholery as long as it ain't dealing w/ me feel me.

Oh yeah on another note, Fall is approaching, and I deff can't wait for the weather and to be surrounded by the pretty leaves and see the trees. I JUST LOVE IT! Anywho, let's go over my fall must haves for myself.

1. A pair of boots (tannish brown)-flat
2. More jeans
3. Versatile sweaters
4. Boots w/ a heel
5. New bag
6. Nice Tat
7. Leather Jacket (specifically this Levi jacket i spotted, but get outta here if you think i'ma post it lol so u can jack my swag)
8. Swangin accesories

i'm talkin lights, camera, action....

ayooo. Truthfully speaking, I feel like my life is a movie...minus the glitz, glamor, and extras to do my stunts for me. Therefore, I get all the bruises and broken legs during my action scenes, boy do those actors have it made lol. Anywho, I started my 5th semester of college, ain't nothin but another year smothered w/ BS. I know people say money isn't everything, but it sure seems that way to me...eff what those philanthropists yapp about. I'm gettin hungry for dough...pillsbury should endorse me...but um. My life...well this past year, oh boy. Some say I changed...Some say I'm the same...some ain't say a damn damn. But ugh...let's just say I've gone through life changing experiences...some I would love to forget, but I know I never could; and others I love to remember. Between love and money...(The Dream) I'd say these past 10 months have been rollercoaster-like. All I know is I'm hungry to grasp my future in my palms...like I just wanna fast forward this part right now...so...

Over the summer the padres and me were constantly beefin...and for awhile things will never be the same...I know that for sure....Other relationships have gotten closer, and some a lil more distant than before. But don't be mad at me...I needed "ME" time, to discover what I want/need/and time to evaluate how things were working in my life. And if u can't accept that, fuck it...if u can't get over it. There's much to say, but not to much I feel to spill. I'm the same 'ol G, w/ some acquired knowledge and a few lbz. lighter lol. yeah ya girl's kinda slim now..well slimmer than before. Write ya later.

Everyday is Valentine...Everyday is Christmas.

uh hum.
it's june 10th, happy bday cuzzo...shawty is 21. and i'll be damn 20 on the 13th...ain't that crazy. I've been alive for 20 years! I'm so ready for my life to get on and poppin. I don't like this in between/interferance stuff right now. If ur meant to be in my life be there and act like it, so i can easily maneuver to my good life already got damn. Cuz ur just makin it harder for me to get there the way i see it. sometimes the way i think and the way i process things i wonder if i'm from a diff planet. Like am i seriously on a diff mindset than you? like somethings that are self-explanatory to me may be so foreign to the next...it's fun trying to understand it, but it's starting to urk the fuck outta me. Can't u just please me the way i want you too?...oh yeah bitches, i'm starting to realize the true selves of u individuals. so be my guest and keep showing those colors so i can paint y'all outta my life with ease. i'm a good individual i feel....i just wanna succeed... that's that kobe in me...defense doesn't exist to me, and a double-team is quite flattering. come get it when u ready for it, cuz frankyly i don't think u are.

Summer = new agenda, same interests, && new roles to be played.

Let's see...how exactly am i feelin?
Andre 3k walks in the room and replies, "FEELIN GOOD FEELIN GREAT.."
yeah, that just about sums it up.
Anywho, summer has began and so much has already happened that it's hysterical! First of all, I had a job. Yes, past tense was used...HAD a job lol. You see, I was goin around knockin on doors of my fellow Georgians preaching about the environment. I had this job for 2 days...and on the 2nd I decided that I was goin to throw the towel in like Soulja Boy says on "DonK" lol. Bc the day was horrible...i had old hags telling me that Obama kills babies...I had ppl just not wantin to hear a damn thing i was sayin...i was hott over there by Briarcliff...like WTF...i was like they can keep this...BUT YOU KNOW...i had put my best foot forward and was doing whatever had to be done because i was tryin to get that 3k...but fuck em. How bout when i got to the office they called me in for a "DEBRIEF" and these hoes said i'm cool as fuck basically, but they have to let me go....lol...WTF i didn't even get to QUIT before they FIRED ME! so i say FUCK THE ENVIRONMENT, loudly and proudly lol.
The next portion of my life...let's see where do I begin?
well, let's just say i'm making progress in an aspect of my life that has been dominating mostly everything that i do...and i'll leave it at that.

By the way...i think i'm in loveeeeeeeeeeeeeeee again!
;)